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Why Isn’t My Twin Flame Relationship Working?

By on February 26, 2017 in Enlightening Articles, Spiritual Awakening
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Why Isn’t My Twin Flame Relationship Working?

by Max and Lana
guest writers for

The twin flame reunion process is one of the most challenging, compelling, and confusing experiences for both partners involved–and often for other people in their lives too. In our previous article “How Do I Know If I’ve Found My Twin Flame?” we discussed characteristics of a twin flame connection, as well as reasons why that type of relationship is significant to twin partners and to the planet as a whole. Unfortunately, once found, your twin flame partner can go through phases of appearing cryptic, distant, scary, unpredictable, or even out-of-sync from the person you know and remember him or her to be.

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As a result, in “Tips for Navigating the Twin Flame Experience” we detailed some of the more common and effective tactics to help partners better manage the deep connection, as well as understand the often overwhelming feelings and obstacles they face. After all, we are socialized to be independent individuals, feel in control, and prioritize our own survival instincts or “self-preservation.” The twin flame connection challenges all of these notions; gives us a glimpse of what unconditional love and oneness truly mean; and forces us to accept vulnerability as a sign of strength. Twin flame partners are DESTINED to reunite permanently, but they can take many years, decades, or even the incarnation to do so. Although Divine and often quite magical, the reunion process itself is far from the fairy tale that we wish it would be!

Consciously and unconsciously, twin flame partners engage in behaviors that can seem counter-productive, detrimental, or hurtful– but these activities are ultimately meant to serve them both, propel their soul missions, and help them assist other people in their world. Thanks to free will, human egos, time lines, and a few other factors listed below, many variables contribute to how quickly and smoothly the permanent twin flame reunion unfolds.

If your twin flame relationship just doesn’t seem to be “working,” there is no reason to feel defeated. Your relationship journey may feel painful and time-consuming, but there are valuable reasons for the periodic delays, difficulties, and heartaches!


Despite the incredible “fit” or familiarity of both partners’ energy signatures, at least one twin partner will “run” from the relationship. The runner may try to sabotage, forget, ignore, or set up strict boundaries regarding the twin partner and the couple’s interactions. Runners fear being dependent on one person emotionally, physically, mentally, and energetically, as doing so makes them vulnerable to incredible pain, disappointment, or despair if the relationship were to fail. As a result, they tend to:  seek out or remain in less intense and lower vibrational relationships; “play the field;” or throw themselves into other endeavors. These efforts are all meant to distract runners and help them overcome the power of the twin flame connection. If given lots of space, most runners will finally “wake up” to the significance of the twin and to the fact that no other partner, destination, or activity will ever be able to take the place of their twin flame relationship.


The twin flame relationship commands so much focus, attention, and energy, as both parties learn to share and align their mental, physical, and emotional aspects. Career endeavors, family and other relationships, and even the physical health of one or both parties can get derailed or demoted because of how much is being devoted to the union. As a result, one or both parties may unconsciously delay finding the twin connection or reuniting permanently until the other important areas of life have been strengthened, fortified, or achieved. So, “getting one’s house in order” and taking advantage of other important opportunities will help make sure that the reunion happens more quickly, and that when it does you are prepared for it in every possible way.


The power of the twin flame connection almost always fuels and inspires very positive transformations for both twin partners. However, such changes are achieved through an extremely intense, trying, and often explosive path. Even the most confident, intelligent, and capable twin partners find themselves to be more emotional, illogical, and volatile in the reunion process than they could have ever imagined. As a result, if one or both partners are prone to addictive, compulsive, or abusive behaviors, the permanent twin flame reunion can be delayed. The twin flame reunion is meant to strengthen both parties, but both need to be able to endure the process without physically harming themselves or each other. Consequently, the reunion may require specific timing or events to precede it so that it does not irreparably damage those involved.

4. OTHER PEOPLE’S TIME LINES: One of the main purposes of twin flame relationships is to strengthen both parties so that they can better assist others in their world. In some cases, one or both parties may temporarily need to be involved in other relationships or endeavors in order to create or preserve a time line that is important to this planet. For this reason, many twin partners are married to other people or have children in other relationships, especially before or soon after meeting the twin. Not only are these relationships and interactions valuable “practice” for a twin, but they almost always lead to positive growth or necessary outcomes for the other parties as well. So, if a twin reunion is delayed or stalled, it is likely that one or both parties are actively affecting someone else’s time line for a greater good, before the permanent twin reunion is allowed to happen here or beyond.


Almost every twin flame partner experiences at least one extremely deep soul mate connection with someone else, which mimics a twin flame relationship. That deep soul connection resonates greatly because he or she is often of similar or familiar frequency and part of a larger soul family that feels like home. A twin flame, on the other hand, is you—your soul’s other half. Most twin partners report that the deep soul connection(s) can feel identical to a twin flame in many positive ways, but in the end are meant to prepare you for one rather than be “the one.”  In such cases, deep soul connections can simply disappear or disintegrate before the actual twin reunion. Sometimes, a deep soul connection will remain in your life for the duration of the incarnation, and will serve as support or even a contrast to the actual twin. So, if a strong relationship disappears for a long time; the relationship is one of many positive and significant connections for you; or the deep relationship gets to a point that it no longer serves your growth, take heart because he or she may not be the actual twin.


Unfortunately, one of the main characteristics of a true twin flame reunion  is that

the first 3-10 years or more of the connection can be hellish–and offer every imaginable challenge, discomfort, and lesson. In a twin flame relationship, if the couple decides to persevere and make it through the very rough patches, the sense of “completion,” confidence, and ease in the relationship actually increase over time because the worst of times and worst of both parties were presented first. On the flip side, deep soul mate connections often start great, and can sustain for a while–but sooner or later are not enough, especially as new challenges or personal nuances present themselves. Many twin flame partners consciously or unconsciously choose to delay their reunion in order to pursue deep soul mate connections that typically aren’t as arduous or painful, especially in the earlier phases. Both the twin flame connection and soul mate connection serve their purpose to fortify you, help you evolve, and prepare you for the next phases of this life and beyond.

Neither type of relationship is “right” or “wrong” or better or worse– just different in when, how, and how intensely they feel better and worse. As you can see from the plethora of challenges and complications involved with a reunion, twin flame partners were never meant to reunite in the same lifetime. They were designed to take turns incarnating so that one could support the other from beyond. Right now, this planet and its people desperately need the intense energies and perspectives that twin flame reunions offer, which is why more and more twin flame couples are incarnating together during this time period. It is an uncomfortable, unaccustomed, and often disconcerting situation for both partners. As a result, the permanent reunions are frequently stalled or delayed to help prepare both parties–as strong individuals and as a powerful couple.

If your twin flame relationship isn’t working, it doesn’t mean the fairy tale reunion doesn’t exist. It just means that the path to it is filled with lots of “tough love” from the universe. Why? So that the permanent reunion CAN take place—when, where, and how that you, your partner, and your world will benefit from it most.

Click here for more articles by Max and Lana!

About the authors: Max, the Healer’s Healer, is an acclaimed energy healer, psychic coach, and medical intuitive. Max and Lana enjoy helping other twin flame partners make the most of this human experience.

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